I hate surprises

びっくりします. That's how to express "surprise" or "I'm surprised" in Japanese.
おもしろくなかった. That's how to say that something was un-fun, or not happy making. These things are pretty related in my head, I'm realizing.
I think we're past all the normal disclaimers about the fact that this blog is just my way of shaping thoughts and getting them into a written form, so that disclaimer will end here.
Short story: today I took my last finals; coincidentally it was also the last day of finals week. As far as my work schedule was concerned, I thought I would only have to work on Sunday and be off for the rest of the week. This, even though I work every five nights, because the calendar/schedule only goes until Thursday. So imagine my excitement when I found out, last night, that I would be working tonight. Now, the events up until now are not, in and of themselves, reason for great concern. Looking at the circumstances logically, I might have imagined that I would work tonight, as it was 5 nights since my last shift. Also, I ended up having no other plans for tonight except maybe getting an early(er) night's sleep. Also, my shifts are in no degree hard or demanding; this is evidenced by the fact that I am composing this blog entry meanwhile. No, the thing that really got me worked up was the fact that this was just not in my own plan for life.
This might be a habit/fixation that I developed on my mission (call it how you will); I feel a very strong need to know what is coming next in my life...and if I don't have something planned out then at least have the assurance that it will be completely up to my decision at the moment. In the mission, of course, the more plans I had the better, but in life outside the mission I'm finding it helpful to have a nice mix of plans and free time periods. It just feels good, having control over my own life, knowing what I'm going to do each day and knowing that, at the same time, I have complete control over whether I end up going through with it or not.
I don't know that I would classify myself as a control freak, because my reaction about break of my control are not huge... rather I'm just left with a sense of frustration and helplessness that gradually weighs me down, bit by bit. All this to get to the point that I don't like surprises. Now, people may say that that's silly, you can like a surprise if it's a good surprise.
No.
That may work for some people (all of whom I can think of, incidentally, happen to be in a movie or tv show, or book), but upon reflecting upon this I realized that I really am better able to get excited about something if I know about it ahead of time. Case in point: For as far back as I remember I've always known what big gift I was going to get for Christmas or my birthday. I mean there's the little stuff, but the bigger stuff is always something I'm generally pretty particular about, so it becomes known earlier on. Which is part one of me not liking "good" surprises: the intent usually doesn't match my expectations. Which is probably why my parents always ask me what I want, because it's the easiest way all around. And on the plus side, I can get in weeks of excited anticipation for my gift, as opposed to the moment of unwrapping something and having the moment to get excited for it. So there's the side of not liking happy surprises, the fact that I won't be able to react well in the moment. However, if there's something I know about in advance, I can get hyped up about it and be properly excited.
Even easier to understand should be my preference to have advance notice of unhappy surprises. Think about it logically; if something bad/unfortunate should occur, is it better to find out in the moment, or find out with time; a week, a month, a year, to prepare yourself for it? I remember the first time I went to EFY; my dad must have told me 4 or 5 months in advance I was going to go. Short personal history: I was very shy as a younger person (0 - ~16 years), so the idea of going to a week long camp with a ton of people, none of whom I knew, was not very exciting for me. But because I had the notice in advance, I was able to prepare myself mentally so that I was actually ready for it when the time came (and of course, it turned out to be an amazing experience).
So that's just some personal info. I don't like surprises. You might be like me in this respect, and you might not. I don't really care. Oh, and here's a video!  I found them from facebook (thank the social netwebz), and have fallen in a cappellove.